We all have core beliefs formulated from our past experiences, passed on to us by our family system, and other factors from the past. Most of the time these beliefs are part of our value system and result in effective behaviour with positive results. However, sometimes we have beliefs which keep us stuck and prevent us from being effective. Even when we become aware of these believes they are difficult to change. I believe that just as they were formed, so they need to be replaced. Over time with new experiences we challenge old debilitating beliefs with new effective ones. Some of these beliefs are embedded deep in our subconscious and we are not aware of them. Through engaging in an introspective process, we become aware of these beliefs. They move from our subconscious to our conscious, where they can be challenged.
Addicts struggle to commit to abstinence and a process of change due to some of these believes. In my experience, doubting your ability to change and sustain change, often is as a result of past failure which results in a belief, that whatever you attempt will result in failure. Another debilitating belie,f I became aware of in my work with addicts is, “I don’t deserve recovery” this belief often leads to the person sabotaging anything good in their life. We tend to seek results which reinforces our belief system. If I believe I’m not good enough, I often behave in ways which result in evidence supporting and reinforcing this belief.
The first step, in my opinion, is to become aware of these beliefs, have an understanding of how they were formulated and look at the results or lack of result they have in your life. In my opinion Step 2 of the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous (came to believe that I could be restored to sanity ) deals with this changing of core beliefs. Came to believe, suggests that this is a process rather than an event. Often with overwhelming evidence that the addict can change by following the suggestion that millions of people have done and experienced with positive results, the old beliefs persist. The belief that this can work for others but not me, remains despite the evidence. That’s where a leap of faith will help, where the addict does some suggestion despite the belief it will not work. Often these small changes will have positive results and the core belief about themself and change will be challenged. This starts the process of coming to believe that this can actually work form me, not just others.
Let us believe in you until you believe in yourself.
SHARING IS CARING
